“Skinny” Jeans

You get 2 for 1 with this post. First, I would like to once again give hipster nation a bit of credit, this time for starting another wildfire: skinny jeans.

Now honestly, I’m not even sure how I feel about them. Sometimes I like them, sometimes I don’t, but in thinking about all of it, I came up with the reason that skinny jeans look good or bad; and the determining factor is the second subject of this post.

Ok, I’m going to say this as nicely as possible, so as not to offend anyone too deeply…ready? FAT PEOPLE STOP WEARING SKINNY JEANS. People who are in shape look good in skinny jeans, and I don’t just mean girls either. But lets be sensible here. I mean goddamn, “skinny” is in the name. It’s like Britney Spears in a Harvard sweater: shit just doesn’t make sense!!

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12 Responses to “Skinny” Jeans

  1. E says:

    Fuck that body snark. If I want to wear skinny jeans, my fat ass will wear skinny jeans.

  2. jp says:

    you’re an ignorant and chauvinistic bastard, and i hate you.

    • bigf00te says:

      Thanks for reading! But that sandwich isn’t gonna make itself so…

      • Keeph says:

        I think they meant chauvinistic in the original sense of the word, something closer to jingoistic than the sexist connotation you seem to be responding to.

        To be fair, you have been focusing on American hipsters.

        As for “hating you”, that’s just over the line.

  3. seriously says:

    hey big red,
    how about you stop repping Jersey Shore’s “T-Shirt Time” as your go to outfit. how the fuck is that fashion? you look like a eurotrash clubber whenever I see you. also, your ginger hair looks fucking TERRIBLE in a fauxhawk. I didn’t think fauxhawks could get any worse until I saw your facebook photos. GINGERS SHOULD NOT DO THE FAUXHAWK. but um, good luck to you with this “blog.”

    • bigf00te says:

      So in conclusion, I looked ripped in my t-shirts and you’re jealous of my ‘hawk? Effin sweet bro! And way to ironically almost-quote me…totally clever. In other news, don’t worry, it’s not creepy at all that you stalk me.

  4. Really foote? says:

    na·tion
       /ˈneɪʃən/ Show Spelled[ney-shuhn] Show IPA
    –noun
    1.
    a large body of people, associated with a particular territory, that is sufficiently conscious of its unity to seek or to possess a government peculiarly its own: The president spoke to the nation about the new tax.
    2.
    the territory or country itself: the nations of Central America.
    3.
    a member tribe of an American Indian confederation.
    4.
    an aggregation of persons of the same ethnic family, often speaking the same language or cognate languages.

    In conclusion:
    What the fuck Foote?

    • bigf00te says:

      Hipsters are a large body of people associated primarily with America. Eclectic is proof that they are conscious of their unity. And yes, I believe hipsters will soon become a political party and attempt to take over the government (see my post “Dudes in Capris”). So that’s what the fuck.

  5. Bro says:

    That’s right bro, people who wants to wear skinny jeans and look good in them, instead of creeping around, scare children and sickening other people, should look good themselves. And for fat ones, if you don’t like being fat, then workout and eat like a human, not a pig.

  6. amy says:

    Hey I’m fat and I was searching to see whether to avoid skinnies or not…. thanks for your opinion! 😀

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